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How To Loosen Tight Hips, Importance Of Playing Multiple Sports From Steph Curry, Jalen Hurt Advice On Overcoming Adversity, & More! (Non-HPL Links)

Georgia’s Jansen Kenty hits game tying dinger in LLWS this year. His hitting coach teaches Catapult Loading System principles.

2018 was fantastic, and these were the HOTTEST topics on our social media throughout the year, according to you – the Hitting Performance Lab tribe.  Thank you ALL for the vote by: click, share, like, and comment – you guys rock!  My personal favorites were numbers: 3 (for selfish reasons of course 😉, 6, & 7… have a Happy and Safe 2019, and ENJOY the following 2018 lesson learned links…

 

#11 – Joe Maddon On The Importance Of Playing Multiple Sports

#10 – A Message To Parents: Why It Bothers Me That You Coach From The Stands

#9 – Too Many Kids Leave Sports Because Of The Car Ride Home

#8 – Parents Need To Stop Trophy-Chasing And Let Their Kids Learn

#7 – 8 Exercises for Tight Hips

#6 – Japan leaves touching thank you note and a spotless locker room after World Cup loss

#5 -Youth sports referees across the US are quitting because of abusive parents

#4 – #MannyMachado dirty or clean? “Sports do not build character. They reveal it.” – Heywood Broun 

#3 – Georgia Little League dad goes crazy for son’s game-tying HR – ESPN Video

#2 – Alabama’s Jalen Hurts Quietly Shows Young Athletes How to Handle Adversity

#1 – Steph Curry: Play Multiple Sports To Get Outside Your Comfort Zone

Coaching Kids

Coaching Kids Reader Question: “How do you get your own kid to listen/trust your advice as a coach and not as a parent?”

Coaching Kids

My son Noah and daughter Gracen, who were 4yo and 1yo respectively, at the time of this photo.

Be comforted to know that most parents I’ve dealt with have a “coaching kids” challenge – especially when it’s their own!  And I’m preparing to have the same challenge with mine…already have coaches lined up who will be working with them when the time comes 😉

Let me start off by saying, this post IS NOT telling you how to raise your kids.  That’s not my place.  I’m offering advice on what works for me.   In addition, I’m not a child psychologist, or any other type of professional dealing in kid behavior.  Just like with everything on this blog, try it out for yourself, if it doesn’t work, then toss it.  Always be testing.

FYI, I may use the words “coach” or “coaching”, where you could also use the word “discipline” or “parent” or “parenting”.

That being said…

Over the years, I’ve received great advice from the parents of my hitters, before I had kids, and now.  When it comes to coaching kids, below is me throwing my brain up on your tech device screen!

In this post I’ll share:

  • The 30,000-foot view tips to keep “seasons of life” into perspective,
  • 18 ways to get your own kid to listen/trust your advice as a coach and not as a parent, and
  • Some high priority books and resources to read on the subject…

 

30,000-foot View Tips to Keep “Seasons of Life” into Perspective

When it comes to coaching kids, one thing to keep in mind from a 30,000-foot view…

I did a 6-week Men’s Fraternity class at my church a few years back.  The purpose of the class was to train and equip “Godly fathers”.  One thing that stuck out for me at the time, was that your perspective as a dad (or mom) MUST change with the season of life.  What does that look like?

  • Up to 12-years-old, parents are seen as coaches.  Most kids in this age range are less resistant to a parent barking orders.
  • During the psychological warfare teenage years, 13-years-old to college, parents are to be seen as a “listening” counselor.  God gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason – to listen twice as much as we talk 😛  And,
  • The years following college, young adults getting into their professional lives, parents move into the “colleague” season of life.  New families, babies, etc.

Another great piece of coaching kids advice for those parents who wear both the “coach” and “parent” hat, was to have the ability to be coach on the field, but mom/dad in the car and away from the field.

One more fantastic piece of advice I received from a coach at Fresno State my Freshman year, at a time when I was so frustrated the coaches were tweaking every mechanical movement I did on the field (at least that’s how it felt to me anyway):

“You don’t need to worry when we’re coaching you.  You need to worry when we aren’t.  It means we’ve given up on you.

Powerful.  That message changed my perspective on coaching the rest of my career at Fresno State!  Look, coaching kids is love.  Make your kids aware of that.

 

18 Ways to get your own kid to Listen/Trust your Advice as a Coach and not as a Parent

I want to preface this section with the fact, I haven’t mastered any of the following points.  That’s right, still working on them.  And I welcome the fear that this process will be a journey, and not a destination.  I’m far from being perfect.  I heard this expert’s advice on one of my wife’s favorite dating shows Love at First Sight:

“If you want to find a perfect person, then you have to be perfect yourself.” One of the frustrated men who got married on the show responded with, “But I’m not perfect”, and the expert added, “Then it looks like you get the message.” (liiight bulb)

We don’t have to be perfect as parents, we just have to be willing to learn, make mistakes, adapt, and try again.  The following list of 18 tips for coaching kids will help (especially when the kids are your own!)

  1. Don’t overdo discipline.  Making mountains out of mole hills – pick your battles. Being consistent with rules and consequences is HUGE.  Remember Goldilocks Golden Rule…too many rules, and they’ll rebel later.  Little to no rules, and they’ll walk all over you and everyone else.  Find the sweet spot.  Without consistent rules and consequences, they won’t build the necessary mental muscles to develop self-discipline when they’re adults.
  2. Avoid overuse and burnout – playing multiple sports or being involved in multiple movement activities is key.  Variety is fun to kids, and the spice of their life.  The same thing over and over can become boring, which leads to burnout.  Bodies engaged in a variety of movements is a healthy body.  Say no to Sport Specialization early on.
  3. Make sure they’re “listening” (the VAK Model) – did you know that in less than 5-minutes, you can get a ballpark of a player’s learning style by asking them a few questions, and watching for where their eyes go? Up to left or right – visual learner.  Side to side – auditory learner.  Down to left or right, and straight ahead – kinesthetic learner (feel).  Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) calls this the VAK Model.  This comes in handy when coaching a child, they don’t look at you, and you tell them, “Look at me when I’m talking to you”…they may primarily be an auditory learner, NOT visual.
  4. Be careful tone of voice – my 5yo son is very sensitive to tone of voice (auditory learner), so I have to be careful when coaching him. I must have good reason to raise my voice during times of correction with him.  Also, tempo of words are important when raising the voice or not.  You want to strive for keeping the voice under control even when raising it.
  5. Don’t question by entrapment – asking leading questions in order to trap them isn’t very effective.  It’s condescending actually.  I’m a work in progress on this one.  Putting kids through an interrogation is a terrible idea, especially if you don’t want resentment later. The key is coming off with genuine curiosity as to why they made the mistake they did.  Remember, they’re not perfect, neither are you.  Easy on paper, hard to apply.
  6. Caution them once, then let them make the mistake (providing mistake doesn’t do extreme physical or mental harm) – ever tell your kid to not do something over and over and over and over?  Lessons are more effective when we get ‘hands on’ experience learning them ourselves.
  7. Praise them whenever they do something you want them to do“You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar”.  Behavioral conditioning is much more effective when rewarding for positive things, rather than punishing for the negative (i.e. taking things away).  See Karen Pryor’s book Don’t Shoot The Dog in the resources below.  I take my 5yo to 7-Eleven to get his favorite candy RIGHT after school. We also award stickers for doing certain things like listening the first time, cleaning up messes at home, and being patient with his little sister when she’s hitting him!  10 stickers earn him a toy in the $10-20 range.
  8. Ask their advice, put yourself in a learning mode – genuine curiosity.  Be honest, you LOVE when others ask for your advice, and seem genuinely interested in what you have to say.  Our kids love giving THEIR advice.  Be interested in their thought process.  I find it fascinating how clever they are at their age.  Sometimes I underestimate them, and they surprise me.
  9. Patience – using guided meditation apps like Headspace or Calm can be a real help with this.  The book resources below will help too.  Extreme patience in infectious.  Kids will model their parents.  If you’re an angry person, then chances are high your kids will be too.
  10. Understand what their big WHY is – what inspires them?  What motivates them?  Are they looking for attention (need significance), love (craving connection), routine (are they overwhelmed), or variety (are they bored)?  Knowing what’s driving their bad or good behavior can be a big help in prevention or promotion in the future.
  11. Show them the book, video, etc. you’re getting your info from – show them the hitting information you’re teaching them isn’t just “your” opinion.  Show them the science, experimentation, case studies, etc.  Give them proof.  Kids are pretty intuitive.  They seem to know when something has legs or when it doesn’t.  Give them proof.  Check out this post on How to Get Hitters to Buy Into the System.
  12. Give them options to “experiment” with – instead of saying, “Do it this way, not that way”.  Give them options.  You like options, don’t you?  Remember, these human movement principles are like bumpers in the gutter lanes of a bowling alley.  I don’t care what path the ball rolls down the lane, just as long as it stays between the bumpers.  A hitter’s stride type (aka “Float”) doesn’t matter, just as long as there is one.  Let them test, and choose which they feel more comfortable with.  Check out this post on Baseball Stride Drills: A How To Guide
  13. Show them high level movement examples – humans learn best by modeling.  Before there were “hitting coaches” – yes, there was such a time – hitters figured it out by watching other high level hitters.  And yes, it’s okay when coaching kids, to teach them high level movements.  Movement is movement.  Just like you wouldn’t teach an 8yo that 2 + 2 = 5 because they’re too young to learn the truth…you wouldn’t do the same with movement.
  14. Fun – coaching kids MUST be fun. I love positively teasing the kids.  I like making things up to see if they’re listening, “Where’s the keys to the batter’s box?”, “Do you know where the box of curve balls is?” “After running past third base, you run to FOURTH base…” etc.  Keep it light, and the drills fun. Check out this post on: TBall Drills: How To Coach Tee Ball Without Going Insane that may be of interest to those frustrated with coaching younger athletes.
  15. Keep expectations reasonable – “reasonable” doesn’t mean below their current ability level.  The expectations will depend on the age group.  Operating at or slightly above skill level will help players grow.  Learn to manage player frustration, know when to regress or progress a drill.
  16. Break things into small bites – make small circles at first.  The accumulation of many small circles build into a BIG circle snowball.  Focus on one movement principle at a time for a week or month, depending on the age and ability level.  Patience is your friend regardless of what decision the coach whose focus is on winning may be.
  17. Reward effort not talent – reward effort.  Reward process not performance.  “Good job!”, “You’re so smart”, and “You’re so talented” are not helpful pieces of feedback.  Coaching kids in character is best.  Remember, kids MUST learn life lessons through sports, not the other way around.
  18. Pat & Pop Method or the compliment sandwich – give the hitter 1-2 things you really like about their swing (the “Pat” on the back), before giving them the constructive criticism (the “Pop” in the mouth).  Or compliment-criticize-compliment sandwich.  You don’t like to be constantly criticized, and neither do they.  Teenagers often call this nagging.  Find the good before finding what needs to be corrected.

 

Coaching Books & Resources

CLICK HERE for a post by the Positive Coaching Alliance titled, “7 Must-Read Books Of All Genres For Parents”.  Here are the books mentioned in that post, and a few others helping solve the question we started off with in this post:

Some I’ve read, and others are currently on my reading list.  This is a perfect segue to shamelessly plug my “sticky coaching” book on Amazon… 😛

Here Are Our Top-10 2017 “Best-Of” Non-HPL Links Shared On Social Media (plus BONUSES)

I wanted to put together a 2017 year-in-review of the Top-10 links we shared on our Facebook fan-page.  How popular a post is depends on Shares, Likes, and Comments.  And I have over 27,066 Facebook fan followers, which is a big study group to judge the helpfulness of these links.

By the way, the following linked resources don’t include Hitting Performance Lab blog posts.  ENJOY!

 

#10 Most Shared Link in 2017

What should you do if…?

“Your child plays in a league that mandates minimum playing time for each player. Your child consistently plays the minimum amount, and never when the game is on the line. The same players always play more than the minimum and are in at crunch time. You don’t think this is fair.”

CLICK HERE for original post.

 

#9 Most Shared Link in 2017

Like Physicist Dr. Alan Nathan told me, body mass isn’t the best indicator of batted ball distance, bat speed is.  If bat speed isn’t at top speed, then Ball Exit Speed won’t be either.  This is GREAT news because teaching bat speed is within the control of EVERY player, body mass?  Not so much.  CLICK HERE for original post.

 

#8 Most Shared Link in 2017

From the post:

“Throughout the recruiting process, [Chris] Collins, Head Basketball Coach at Northwestern University, says he observes parents in the stands to help identify the sort of environment the recruit grew up with. In the recruiting process, coaches should begin to notice if parents are supportive and positive, or negative while encouraging individualistic behavior that only regards their son or daughter rather than the entire team.”

CLICK HERE for original post.

 

#7 Most Shared Link in 2017

From the post:

“These 8 movements take just a short amount of time, so you can add them in throughout your day to break up long bouts of sitting, or you can even use them as a warm-up to your regular training routine…Our hips are incredible structures that allow us to be mobile and strong and perform everything from the most mundane activities as walking to amazing feats of strength and power shown by the finest athletes.  Take the time to take care of your hips and your life will be the better for it.

CLICK HERE for original post.

 

#6 Most Shared Link in 2017

One of the best quotes in this Wall Street Journal article?

“These self-made hitting gurus didn’t play in the big leagues, operate outside the mainstream and are convinced there is a better way to hit than what’s being taught at the major-league level. And they are rattling the baseball establishment.

CLICK HERE for original post.

 

#5 Most Shared Link in 2017

From the post:

“Colt McCoy says this is because specialization limits the skills kids can learn, both motor and relationship skills, from playing multiple sports. Being on different teams gives kids an opportunity to learn and grow.  The other benefit of playing multiple sports is that you don’t get burned out. McCoy shares here that he didn’t know he was going to play football in college until his junior year in high school!  He continued to play basketball, golf, and other sports through high school because he liked being a part of different teams. McCoy strongly feels that when kids specialize at too young an age they miss out ‘on what sports truly encompass.'”

CLICK HERE for original post.

 

#4 Most Shared Link in 2017

Many of you know how I feel about the ground-ball hitting approach.  I think the biggest push back from pro GB hitting coaches is because they have no clue how to optimize line drive Launch Angles in their hitters.  Do you have a hitter with above average speed?  Then why not teach him or her to drive the ball with authority too?  Gives them another tool for their toolbox.  Teaching a fast runner to JUST hit the ball on the ground is just plain lazy.  Be better than that.  When coaches aren’t growing, they’re dying.  Make hitters better.  Give them more tools.  CLICK HERE for the original post.

 

#3 Most Shared Link in 2017

Shameful conduct.  Bullies.  I feel bad for the young ladies on this team who were seen as guilty by association. CLICK HERE for the original post.

 

#2 Most Shared Link in 2017

How cool is this?!  From the post:

“Joe Jackson was at the Rangers’ Spring Training complex on Friday, and no, you did not somehow step into a time machine and travel back to the 1910s. It was Joe Jackson, the 24-year-old Minor Leaguer who, yes, is the great-great-grandnephew of Shoeless Joe Jackson”. 

CLICK HERE for the original post.  And our MOST SHARED non-HPL link in 2017 was…(drum-roll please)

 

#1 Most Shared Link in 2017

This video is well worth your time. George Springer’s dad was interviewed after World Series Game-7 ended, and after his son received the MVP award.  Great insight into what dad taught Junior growing up, even discussing a unique perspective to the stuttering challenges George Springer (son) grew up with.  CLICK HERE for the original post.

And for the BONUSES…

 

BONUS #11 Most Shared Link in 2017

As many of you know, I love getting athletes to move better.  If we do that, then they’ll perform better. This is a great routine to help with stiff hamstrings, which surprisingly is what most of my hitters have!  CLICK HERE for the original post.

 

BONUS #12 Most Shared Link in 2017…ahem…I mean First Week January 2018

This was a recent popular January 2018 post, but I wanted to include it here.  Preaching the ‘Sticky Coaching’ gospel for parents.  CLICK HERE for the original post.